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Q: If you had the money what would your personal library look like? What would be in it? What colours, decoration etc would you put in it?
That's one loaded question indeed!
Umm...well let's see. First and foremost, I would love my personal library to be either in the loft or in the basement! I love the idea of having a library in a secluded portion of the house, like a world different form reality, a safe haven, my own little clubhouse with a trapdoor! :P
It would be warm and well lit, with a gigantic comfy couch and soft rugs to read on for hours on end.
A fancy desktop, a large bulletin board and some flashy posters would complete the look.
And if I'm being really self indulgent I might just get a high tech security system for the place to keep people away from my pretties. :D What? I'm possessive about my books like that.
And while none of these pictures do justice to what I have in mind, I liked the look and feel of these little libraries.
“Sometimes I think people take reality for granted.”
Goodreads Synopsis
Reality, it turns out, is often not what you perceive it to be—sometimes, there really is someone out to get you. Made You Up tells the story of Alex, a high school senior unable to tell the difference between real life and delusion. This is a compelling and provoking literary debut that will appeal to fans of Wes Anderson, Silver Linings Playbook, and Liar.
Alex fights a daily battle to figure out the difference between reality and delusion. Armed with a take-no-prisoners attitude, her camera, a Magic 8-Ball, and her only ally (her little sister), Alex wages a war against her schizophrenia, determined to stay sane long enough to get into college. She’s pretty optimistic about her chances until classes begin, and she runs into Miles. Didn't she imagine him? Before she knows it, Alex is making friends, going to parties, falling in love, and experiencing all the usual rites of passage for teenagers. But Alex is used to being crazy. She’s not prepared for normal.
Funny, provoking, and ultimately moving, this debut novel featuring the quintessential unreliable narrator will have readers turning the pages and trying to figure out what is real and what is made up.
My Review
“I didn't have the luxury of taking reality for granted. And I wouldn't say I hated people who did, because that's just about everyone. I didn't hate them. They didn't live in my world.
But that never stopped me from wishing I lived in theirs.”
I've always had a peculiar fascination with Schizophrenia.
How does it feel to be unable to distinguish between reality and imagination? How does one cope when the things they adore turn out to be non-corporeal, and just another figment of their mind's creations?
These questions hound my brain every time I encounter a book or a movie dealing with Schizophrenia; be it John Nash and his non-existent best friend in A Beautiful Mind, Bipasha Basu and her dreamed-up lover in Madhoshi, or poor Karthik who received phone calls from himself in Karthik Calling Karthik.
Francesca Zappia's debut novel deals with the disease in simple yet incredibly engaging way. The protagonist Alexandra Victoria Ridgemont (yeah....her parents were history enthusiasts) a.k.a Alex is a schizophrenic teenager about to start her senior year at a new school after being expelled from her previous school due to some incident, that was a result of just one of the many manifestations of her disease.
Alex was a delightful protagonist. Her small little quirks- like doing perimeter checks before entering any building, arguing with her self over what was real and what wasn't, her habit of clicking pictures to assure herself that her mind wasn't playing tricks on her, her enthusiasm for history and her adorable adorable impulsiveness- were absolutely relishing to read. It was a bittersweet experience to be inside her head, as she battled with the line between paranoid and crazy and fantasy and reality. I loved that despite of her disease she refused to take shit from anybody and was amazingly strong throughout the book.
“Was everything made up? Was this whole world inside my head? If I ever woke up from it, would I be inside a padded room somewhere, drooling all over myself?
Would I even be myself?”
The second extremely likeable, extremely flawed, yet extremely bewitching character was that of Miles James Richter. A total nerd at heart, a boy who "had a way with words", who knew the names of all the Aztec emperors, who played pranks on people for money....these are just some of the shades of the enigma that was Miles. He was the perfect YA hero. Except that it doesn't feel right to call him a hero. He was just Miles, a constant looming mystery that was unraveled bit by bit throughout the course of the book.
The development of Miles' and Alex's relationship was cute- no insta love and no cliche YA mush and cheese- just a sweet, gradual ascent into love.
“Mile's fingers pressed into the small of my back. "Basorexia," he mumbled.
"Gesundheit."
He laughed. "It's an overwhelming desire to kiss."
"I thought you weren't good at figuring out what you felt."
"I'm probably using the word in the wrong context. But I'm pretty sure that's what this is.”
I loved all the secondary characters in the book- be it the bitchy Celia, the eccentric school principal, Alex's little sister Charlie and Alex's enchantingly diverse group of friends- everybody had their part to play in the book and the story didn't appear to be about just one person but about everybody.
The story was witty, engaging and unique in a way that made me realise that perhaps each of us has a bit of crazy inside our minds and it all narrows down to the definition of crazy that deemed one crazy.
"Einstein’s definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I kept taking pictures, hoping I’d look at one and know its subject was a delusion. I did my perimeter checks, thinking I’d eventually be able to walk around paranoia-free. I spent every day hoping someone would tell me I smelled like lemons.
If I wasn’t insane by anyone else’s definition, I figured I was at least insane by Einstein."
“If you desired someone, if he comforted you, if you thought he might leech the poison out of your heart, was that love? Or only desperation?”
Goodreads Synopsis
Based on the classic fairy tale Beauty and the Beast, Cruel Beauty is a dazzling love story about our deepest desires and their power to change our destiny.
Since birth, Nyx has been betrothed to the evil ruler of her kingdom-all because of a foolish bargain struck by her father. And since birth, she has been in training to kill him.
With no choice but to fulfill her duty, Nyx resents her family for never trying to save her and hates herself for wanting to escape her fate. Still, on her seventeenth birthday, Nyx abandons everything she's ever known to marry the all-powerful, immortal Ignifex. Her plan? Seduce him, destroy his enchanted castle, and break the nine-hundred-year-old curse he put on her people.
But Ignifex is not at all what Nyx expected. The strangely charming lord beguiles her, and his castle-a shifting maze of magical rooms-enthralls her.
As Nyx searches for a way to free her homeland by uncovering Ignifex's secrets, she finds herself unwillingly drawn to him. Even if she could bring herself to love her sworn enemy, how can she refuse her duty to kill him? With time running out, Nyx must decide what is more important: the future of her kingdom, or the man she was never supposed to love.
My Review
“Knowing the truth is not always a kindness.”
When the synopsis promised a different take on the classic fairy tale of Beauty and the Beast, never in my wildest speculations did I think that it would amount to this- this artistically written poetic jumble of lore, legend and myth.
Enter Nyx Triskelion- daughter raised like a lamb for slaughter, to atone for the sins of her father and avenge her dead mother. Nyx's character was perfect because of her imperfections, most of which made her seem eerily real. The jealousy and hatred that gripped her adolescent heart, the love she tries to bear her sister even though she despises her, her gnawing desire for affection and acceptance and her quest for vengeance were all beautifully written.
“If one of us had to die, it ought to be the one with poison in her heart.”
Ignifex's or the Demon Lord's character was another delight. His snarky comments, the occasionally seen vulnerable side, his acceptance of his cruel nature and less-than-noble intents and his devil-may-care attitude made him the perfect YA hero/anti-hero. A more interesting characterisation was that of his pious-than-though shadow self Shade. Shade's personality was as complex as Ignifex's. Throughout the book, it was impossible to judge or predict anyone's intentions or actions. All of them were immensely flawed creatures searching for their true selfs.
“You fought and fought to keep all the cruelty locked up in your head, and for what? None of them ever loved you, because none of them ever knew you”
“You deserve all that and more. It made me happy to see you suffer. I would do it all over again if I could." I realized I was shaking as the words tumbled out of me. "I would do it again and again. Every night I would torment you and laugh. Do you understand? You are never safe with me." I drew a shuddering breath, trying to will away the sting of tears.
He opened his eyes and stared up at me as if I were the door out of Arcadia and back to the true sky. "That's what makes you my favorite." He reached up and wiped a tear off my cheek with his thumb. "Every wicked bit of you.”
The plot was fantastic- a completely twisted take on the classic fairy tale. The complexity of the story increased somewhat exponentially in the latter chapters but the initial ones had enough banter and description to keep me occupied.
“And you would know so much about women, locked up in your castle."
"Locked up with eight wives. And sometimes I make house calls for my bargainers. There's many a lovely woman desperate enough to bargain with me."
This idea had never occurred to me before. "You touch another woman and I'll cut your hands off," I snapped.
He looked delighted. "I thought you were afraid of hurting me.”
I loved the bickering between Nyx and Ignifex, her exasperation and his wisecracks, their delicate dance for dominance.
“If you start wondering how this house works, you'll likely go mad. That could be amusing, I suppose. Especially if it's the kind of madness that causes you to run naked through the hallways. Do feel free to indulge in that anytime.”
The naming of characters was interesting. Ignifex and his masters- the so called villains of the story- were named the Gentle Lord and the Kindly Ones respectively. It was a fantastic oxymoron because even though they twisted their bargains with the humans viciously around loopholes, they still left clues for the poor unsuspecting humans to find their way out of the mess they created.
This is a story not just about love and passion and vengeance, but also about hatred and self discovery and consequences. It tells us that everything in life is a result of the decisions we make, that everything has a price, that no one is completely pure and everyone has a little poison in their heart and an internal demon just waiting to be cut loose.
“We'll both be foolish," I said, "and vicious and cruel. We will never be safe with each other."
"Don't try too hard to be cheerful." His fingers threaded through mine.
"But we'll pretend we know how to love." I smiled at him. "And someday we'll learn."
